Friday, April 17, 2009

that unbalanced feeling

As I near the end of my temp job, I am also excitedly gearing up for what is next. The summer always brings about fun activities; birthdays, concerts, night parties...
I start my art teaching gig next week, have started mentally planning for a independent business venture, and will be connecting with my cousin to use some of her networks...
I feel fine, I feel strong in love, in family, and in optimism.
But this week I also felt scared, and worried, and shameful; when my aunt was taken to the ER after falling in the driveway. I know I can't be there to catch her every time, but I have to make a conscious effort to be more available.
I also felt anxious, and tense, and tired this week-- my 40 mile drive to work on the busiest LA freeways are starting to take a toll.
I guess those things seem insignificant compared to all the goodness around...my family is here visiting, I have extra cash to do some fun things for myself, and my aunt is well, laughing like her normal self in that hospital bed.

As i write out this blog i realize that everything balances itself out, soon my aunt will be home, and I will have learned something new; a new way to help, a new way to be better prepared.
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